The Struggle Was Real…

I guess I have issues in life. Some of which I am aware and some are so deep rooted in my sub conscious that I am not aware of. But they are there, determining my every move and thoughts.  So my actions and personality attributes are set accordingly.

As a coping mechanism to bullying in my early childhood (especially for being fat), I’ve developed making self-depreciation jokes. This helped me in my childhood because I realized people stopped making fun of me if I made fun of myself. The other thing that helped people stop making fun of me is beating the shit out of them or being a real bitch to them. But I prefer the self-depreciation-jokes way. Being mean to people made me feel bad and teary eyed at the end of the day.

It is quite crappy though that how someone’s pain or weak points bring joy to others.

Now the real funny thing is, even though sometime people still try to ridicule me, I don’t give a rat’s ass anymore. Although I still make self-belittling jokes and write about unflattering things about myself and incidents that happened to me in the past.  However, they are not done to stop making others do the same… I do it, because in retrospective, those incidents were ludicrous and I have come to terms with the fact that I never was, and never will be, the coolest person in the world… EVER!!!

PS: I am guessing this is the last post for 2017, (unless I write more), so wishing you guys a Happy & Prosperous 2018.


Image source –, Pinterest

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